David Sedaris

"I've been keeping a diary for thirty-three years and write in it every morning. Most of it's just whining, but every so often there'll be something I can use later: a joke, a description, a quote. It's an invaluable aid when it comes to winning arguments. 'That's not what you said on February 3, 1996,' I'll say to someone."

-David Sedaris

I awoke a couple of days ago and felt an insufferable case of the Mondays; that malaise one feels at the end of March. Deep inside you know it's technically spring, and it's supposed to be infused with the feeling of rebirth and renewal and other marketing buzzwords from places like Bath & Body Works.

To be honest, I wasn't sure why I was blue. Perhaps I was merely run-down. I had, after all, just returned from an amazing Spring Break trip, and trying to get back into the routine of a working life after a prolonged absence is always difficult to readjust to. It's like when you're on a people mover at an airport, and you step off of the conveyer belt back onto stationary ground. Your momentum shifts to a halt, and no matter how hard you try to maintain a graceful stride you always step off and land with the grace of a newborn fawn. So this lingering sense of jet lag from international travel combined with fluctuating Texas weather had finally culminated into a generally foggy state of mind.

I was playing ridiculously bad pop music in my head in the shower that morning, when a thought flashed through like a bolt of lightning amidst my brain's cumulonimbus clouds. Is it...? Is it April already? I blinked and placed the bottle of aromatherapy shampoo in the shower caddy. It... it is April!

And like that, it was as if a sunbeam bore through the clouds. My focus shifted and, like a allergy medicine commercial, the veil lifted and life's viewfinder was suddenly crystalline clear. What does April historically mean to me? Well, among other things, the month brings April showers, schizophrenic weather patterns, clearance Easter candy at the local market, a run on allergy meds, and most importantly... Big laughs here in Austin. In what has become a bit of a annual rite, The Paramount welcomes David Sedaris back to the Long Center for what is sure to be another evening of anecdotes, diary entries, book recommendations, tears and exhausted facial muscles.

In what has become itself a rite of spring, the arrival of David Sedaris to town is more welcome than any weather-forecasting groundhog, velvet-clad leprechaun or chocolate-peddling bunny. When David is in Austin, it's always a treat. Sure, it's a peek into the mind of the single funniest man you will ever listen to, but it's also just so damn hilarious. He may not put the "fun" into "funny," but he certainly highlights it with his sardonic wit and clever cultural observations.

For those that don't already know, Sedaris is an author, playwright and a regular commentator on National Public Radio. I love how his descriptions are incredibly vivid. He uses words to paint scenarios and characters in your head as effortlessly as Bob Ross made happy little trees with a sponge and a dab of chartrueuse paint. In fact, this years visit has a greater significance because the day before he speaks, his latest book will be released in stores, Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls.

Yes, you read that right. David himself briefly explains the book's title below:


Needless to say, many of us are eagerly waiting this new collection. Maybe not like those Muggles- er, I mean crazies that camped out for Harry Potter, but certainly with great enthusiasm. And yet, no matter how many times you've read his works, there is nothing quite like hearing telling you a story orally.

There's a whole new level of vibrancy when you hear David tell a story or read a journal entry. His soothing yet nasally voice make the contrast between the nondescript details of his observations and the shocking aspects elevate a simple tale into high art. Imagine your high school Geometry teacher stopped his normal drone about acute angled. Then, without changing the inflection of his voice, continue into a calm rant about the obtuse behavior of a boorish and crass society. David's dry wit and delivery go down smoothly like a glass of red wine with top notes of sarcasm.

Not merely an advocate for his own observations, a bonus treat at his shows is when he personally recommends something he is currently reading. Last year, he raved about the darkly funny Deadly Kingdom: The Book of Dangerous Animals by Gordon Grice, a collection of anecdotes and facts about  some of nature's thugs, capable of wrecking havoc on humans. A quick read through this and you may proclaim, "The heck with the gun control debate, keep that marsupial away from me!"

In years past, David also takes questions from the audience and will stay afterwards to sign books for all who attend. It would be an ideal time to ask followup questions about his new book, although he may not be willing to explore the glucose levels of Hedwig. You're better off asking a Harry Potter fan about that one.


So with the fog lifted and my scalp smelling minty fresh, I stepped out of the shower and circled the date on the calendar to mark the annual visit of David Sedaris. Until then, I'll continue to wash my hair every morning with some of that Eucalyptus Spearmint shampoo. That aromatherapy always makes me feel better, according to Bath & Body Works. And while I'm not inclined to believe the marketing, I will heed last year's warnings about deadly animals. I now pray that a wild koala won't attack me because I lathered, rinsed and then repeated.

David Sedaris visits The Long Center as part of the season series on Wednesday, April 24 at 8:00 p.m.

Fuel

After spring break and the ides of March, the summertime is on the fasttrack for arrival. And, per tradition, we can look forward to the regulars of the warmer months: sunglasses, sunny vacations and the oh so predictable high fuel prices. Like clockwork, we can expect to see the upward creep of dollars and cents at the gas pump after Memorial Day weekend. Heck, you can probably already see it happening now. We scrounge to save mere pennies while burning our dollars on the tried and true money pit that is our continued reliance on oil to fuel ourselves.

There's just got to be a better way, right?

April and Earth Day is a time for deliberation and activism to preserve our environment. What better way to usher in the month than by continuing The Beautiful World Series at The Paramount this season? This four film series this year is brought to you in conjunction with The Cynthia and George Mitchell Foundation, and are designed to celebrate, preserve and protect our delicate planet.

Although not from the same filmmakers, FUEL is a spiritual sequel to the ideas raised in the acclaimed documentary AN INCONVIENENT TRUTH. Directed by Josh Tickell, FUEL looks at the topic of energy in America. Tickell makes the film a personal platform as he tries to reconcile his upbringing in Louisiana (an oil-rich state) with the debate towards alternative energy sources. FUEL examines a wide range of energy solutions, the faltering US auto and petroleum industries, and the American mindset toward alternative energy. Along his journey, Tickell advocates the use of biodiesel - a diesel alternative made from plant oils as a possible solution. FUEL presents its case for America to think outside the oil barrel while illustrating that, like Tickell, any one of us can make a difference.


A New York Times Critics' Pick and winner of the Sundance Film Festival Audience Award for Best Documentary, FUEL is significant film that can impact all who see it. After the screening, a Q&A session will be moderated by The Cynthia and George Mitchell Foundation. A rousing and inspiration film hopefully yields some advocacy and advancement.

When one considers the expanse of our dependency on oil, it's clear that America has struggled with an addiction of Lindsey Lohan proportions. Alas, to help stave off our craving, the onus is on us to stage our own intervention. Although we got our first shock during the oil crisis of 1973, decades of geopolitical unrest and posturing has yielded little in our ability to break the habit.

Like George Santayana said, "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it." What more do we have to endure to initiate a real change and shift in our attitudes?

I mean, think about it. Have we so quickly forgotten this scene from the 70s?

?
Spooky what supply and demand hath wroth.

And if that's not disheartening, how about this scary image from what will likely be the near future?
(Parental guidance suggested for the image below. Please cover your wallet's eyes)

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Yeah. It's not a pretty prospect unless we act now.

Often when prices spike, there's always some faction out there that believe boycotting is the answer, yet it's often merely just a misdirection. Our real greatest hope is to heed the cautionary signs and look for the next fuel solution. This film aims to help spark discussion and ignite that very action. A rousing and inspirational look at what keeps our country moving, FUEL hopes to get you moving in bold new directions long after the last reel ends.

Your brain is ripe for some fresh perspective on the energy dilemma. Fill 'er up.


FUEL will be syphoned into your mind on Wednesday, April 3rd 2013 at 7:30 pm.

The Second City: Laughing Matters

"I came out of the old Second City in Chicago. Chicago actors are more hard-nosed. They're tough on themselves and their fellow actors. They're self-demanding... you learned to make the other actor look good so you looked good."

 -Bill Murray

Is it me, or is it possible that the Mayans were onto something? Maybe they were off a couple of months on their calendar of doom, but things lately have been more in the realms clouds of doom and gloom. We've had North Korea testing nukes, meteors exploding over an impressively calm Russian populace, and the disaster that is the newest Die Hard movie. It bring to mind the end-of-the-world proclamations of Bill Murray in Ghostbusters, "dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria!"

Call me crazy, but I think we all could use a cold beer good chuckle. You know, something to serve as a friendly reminder that in these times, laughing matters.

Luckily for us, it's time to tap the keg of funny. The Paramount will be hosting The Second City, a Chicago-based improvisational team that has been providing laughs for over 50 years. Before The Groundlings, before The Upright Citizens Brigade, before Saturday Night Live, Second City was pioneering new comedy trails with its signature non-confomist spirit and satirical wit.

They have resident stages in Chicago and in Toronto, and in addition to their touring companies still entertain over one million people a year. If you're old enough, you may remember SCTV, a Canadian sketch comedy show like Saturday Night Live that served as a springboard for comedians the likes of John Candy, Martin Short, Eugene Levy, Catherine O'Hara and many others.

The Chicago company is also chock full of legendary alumni that has inspired awe by comedians young and old.

“The first time I went to see a Second City show, I was in awe of everything. I just wanted to touch the same stage that Gilda Radner had walked on. It was sacred ground.”

-Tina Fey 

The list of alumni is amazing, and their work has been the foundation for much of the comedy landscape we enjoy to this day. A great sense of humor is timeless, and the talents of these comedians will endure much longer than any Harlem Shake video or internet cat meme.

Amongst The Second City hall of fame are: Alan Arkin, Fred Willard, Joan Rivers, Robert Klein, John Belushi, Harold Ramis, Bill Murray, Gilda Radner, Dan Ackroyd, Bonnie Hunt, Mike Myers, Chris Farley, Amy Sedaris, Steve Carell, Steven Colbert and Tina Fey.


When they arrive for their performances at The Paramount, the touring Second City ensemble will be
featuring some of the best sketches, songs, and improvisations from the Chicago group from the past five decades. No matter if its an archival gem or contemporary satire, it promises to be more entertaining than dashboard videos of meteors blazing across the skies and scaring the bejeebus out of us. It also will be funnier than the concept of Bruce Willis or Ben Affleck saving us from those meteors.  Why? Because The Second City intends to be funny.

Gather around and laugh at the face of our pending armageddon with the next generation of Second City legends. Enjoy them today, just in case a raging asteroid of death dictates that tomorrow never arrives. If so, I'd rather die laughing. So come on, you don't wanna miss a thing.


Catch The Second City on:

Wednesday, February 20th at 8:00 pm
Thursday, February 21st at 8:00 pm
Friday, February 22nd at 7:00 pm and 9:30 pm
Saturday, February 23rd at 7:00 pm and 9:30 pm

Wynton Marsalis & Jazz at The Lincoln Center

Jazz again takes a turn on the showcase of the Paramount stage, and this time the featured artist is Wynton Marsalis, who is practically a member of musical royalty. Marsalis is coming, and he's bringing an orchestra with him. Jazz at the Lincoln Center is not the name of an event, but is a the name of the arts institute he co-founded in 1987. A big band of the same name travels with him, and now they will bring their big sound to the big state of Texas. Needless to say, this is no small event. Marsalis is not just any artist, but an ambassador of classical music and of the great American musical form of Jazz itself.

Wynton, an amazing jazz trumpeter, hails from (what many consider to be) the first family of modern American Jazz. The Marsalis patriarch, Ellis, was a jazz musician from New Orleans who broke the mold of dixieland musicians decades ago. Over the years, he worked with scores of other artists and was regarded as one of he most influential pianists on the scene. Wynton and three of his brothers all became musicians in their own right, keeping the momentum of jazz propelling forward into new generations. He began studying trumpet at age 12, and moved to New York at age 18 to attend the Juilliard School of Music. Less than a year later, he signed with Columbia Records. Wynton released his first album in 1982, and has since created numerous jazz and classical recordings that have sold millions across the globe.

Naturally for someone of his caliber, the accolades have flowed his way like a series of cool jazz riffs. Marsalis has won nine Grammy awards, and is the only person to ever win Grammys for jazz and classical records.  In 1997, he became the first jazz musician to win the Pulitzer Prize in music, for his epic oratorio, Blood on the Fields, about a couple moving from slavery towards freedom.

For the last quarter century, Marsalis and Jazz at the Lincoln Center have preformed around the globe. Wynton has performed in over 30 countries and on every continent, with the exception Antarctica. Penguins may be accustomed to cooler climates, but apparently they've missed out on some cool cool jazz.

When playing together, the big band is like a force of nature. Take, for instance, this performance of Marsalis and the Jazz at the Lincoln Center Orchestra a few years ago in San Diego. They perform a little John Coltrane, but it's just... simply... wow. It's hard for words to describe.


My goodness, just listen to that, will ya? Incredible. Now, just close your eyes and imagine this sound without the restraint of your computer, smartphone or tablet speakers that you probably just heard this on. Imagine this filling the auditorium of The Paramount... where the sound can envelope you, fill you mind, and make a cool little smile creep up the side of your face like a rising balloon.

This man with a limitless work ethic is also a advocate for the arts and an educator to boot at the institute, never tiring in his pursuit in bringing classical music and jazz to masses the owrld over. And now, Wynton brings his signature sound to The Paramount. Join the band in the vaulted venue, and let him teach you a thing or two on this upcoming night.


Horns up, Austin (brass horns, that is). Wynton Marsalis and Jazz at the Lincoln Center Orchestra bring it on Wednesday, February 6th. And that's truly something to get all jazzed up about.